Today was a very typical day for me. I do not start classes until May 2 and being new to the country I have no friends; this makes for lots and lots of free time. So I decided to take a trip downtown to pick up an envelope that had arrived in the mail.
Downtown Guayaquil is quite nice. I consider it to be a very clean and safe place, and not crowded at all. However, my time in South America has been largely spent in Caracas, Venezuela. A city so dirty, so crowded, so dangerous that it has the most murders of any city in the world. In fact, I recently found out that they won´t even report the exact numbers anymore, it´s just that bad. So it´s safe to say I have been tainted. What seems surprisingly clean and orderly to me would probably make the average gringo run to the nearest American embassy in a panic.
I got a ride downtown and was therefore able to avoid the hassle of taking a bus. Walking along the streets, I was able to pick up a nice snack of cheddar chips and a bottle of water. Total cost- .55 cents. After picking up my envelope some random guy on the street came up to me. At first I thought he was a beggar, judging by his ripped t-shirt and haggard appearance. Turns out he just wanted to talk. He had lived in the United States before and spoke a surprising amount of English. He figured- I´m a gringo, he´s lived in my country before, we should be friends! That´s how a lot of people are around here. Very friendly and talkative, I like that.
As I´m typing this I just realized he IS a beggar. He was eating a piece of bread out of a trash bag and when I asked him where he lived he said I could always find him around those particular streets, dodging the question. I now feel very dumb. Poor guy, he went from living in the Land of the Free to begging in the streets all day in the Land of the Very Angry Sun.
After the beggar I hopped on the Metro-Via bus which took me to the Terminal. For those of you who have never been down south the Terminal is always the place to find a bus to anywhere in the country. It took me a while to figure out how the system worked but I found my bus, paid my .25 cents, and hopped on. I was going to take the bus home but then I figured I would stop at an internet cafe, or ¨cyber¨as they are called here. Looking at the little box at the top of my screen I see that I owe almost $5. I have been here a long, long time. I wish I could just book out of here and not pay it. Sometimes having morals sucks.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Moving
Yes, it's true. I am moving from the south side of Guayaquil to the high-class north side. This is the rich area, full of Ecuadorian business tycoons and young professionals. Kids who grow up here are called "aniñados", meaning spoiled rich kids. I'm moving here because my grandfather has an old friend here who has offered to take me in. I'll take a some pictures of my new subdivision and post them soon because it is truly a beautiful place. But first- a look back at the house where I've been staying until now.
The view from the top of the building. This is the south side of Guayaquil. People say that it is dangerous and definitely not the best face of the city.
While the surrounding area wasn't too nice, the building itself of my grandfathers compadre is a palace.
First off and most important, the air-conditioning unit in the room me and my Grandfather shared. How I miss it!
The view from the top of the building. This is the south side of Guayaquil. People say that it is dangerous and definitely not the best face of the city.
While the surrounding area wasn't too nice, the building itself of my grandfathers compadre is a palace.
Monday, April 23, 2007
My Grandfather is Nuts
This morning he woke me up with the usual Ecuadorian music. Very happy stuff, some lady singing excitedly with a lot of trumpets. Not appropriate for a morning wake up call in my opinion. When I commented on the music he began another one of his monologues, this time about how everyone should be healthy and how his compadre Don Miguel (he is the owner of the mammoth concrete building in which I stay) needs to lose weight.
Apparently, my grandfather thought he could help Don Miguel to lose weight by instructing him to listen to this happy Ecuadorian music and dance. Keep in mind that my grandfather is 79 years old and his compadre just 2 years younger. My grandfather demonstrated his last point by dancing in a jerky, vigorous fashion swinging arms and legs everywhere. Being semi-lucid and tired, this was freaking hilarious to me and I could hardly keep from laughing.
Apparently, my grandfather thought he could help Don Miguel to lose weight by instructing him to listen to this happy Ecuadorian music and dance. Keep in mind that my grandfather is 79 years old and his compadre just 2 years younger. My grandfather demonstrated his last point by dancing in a jerky, vigorous fashion swinging arms and legs everywhere. Being semi-lucid and tired, this was freaking hilarious to me and I could hardly keep from laughing.
Friday, April 20, 2007
I´m a Power Ranger
So I was getting ready to eat dinner with everyone yesterday when another relative showed up. I don´t remember her name (I never do), but I know she was a foreign exchange student in Germany for a while. She brought her two kids with her, one boy and one girl. Both tiny little things with squeaky voices. I love to hear little kids talk in Spanish, they sound so cute and funny. When I finally find my Shakira and settle down, we will have no less than 5 offspring and they will all speak Spanish.
Anyways, at the start of dinner I noticed the little boy staring at me. After a while of this wide-eyed stare he called his mother over. Then wrapping his tiny arms around her head he pulled her down to his level so he could whisper in her ear. I knew he was talking about me, but what manners! When I was a child I would always ask why someone was so fat, loudly and in a piercing high voice. My poor parents :(
When the whispering had stopped I asked his mother if he found my accent strange and was curious. She replied that no, he was just awed that a Power Ranger would eat dinner with them. That is awesome! I was kind of flattered, though I hate the Power Rangers as does anyone over the age of twelve. Yet they are superheroes in the eyes of children. Granted, any other blondish American would be mistaken for a Power Ranger but still!
Another interesting tidbit I found out about has to do with the German girl that came to Ecuador as part of the same student exchange. They told me she was a very white girl, perhaps even whiter than my own deathly pale skin, though I find that hard to believe. She tried to get a tan. The result was 2nd degree burns all over her body and a forced trip back to Germany to heal. So when I mention the heat and sun this charred land has, know that I speak the truth.
Anyways, at the start of dinner I noticed the little boy staring at me. After a while of this wide-eyed stare he called his mother over. Then wrapping his tiny arms around her head he pulled her down to his level so he could whisper in her ear. I knew he was talking about me, but what manners! When I was a child I would always ask why someone was so fat, loudly and in a piercing high voice. My poor parents :(
When the whispering had stopped I asked his mother if he found my accent strange and was curious. She replied that no, he was just awed that a Power Ranger would eat dinner with them. That is awesome! I was kind of flattered, though I hate the Power Rangers as does anyone over the age of twelve. Yet they are superheroes in the eyes of children. Granted, any other blondish American would be mistaken for a Power Ranger but still!
Another interesting tidbit I found out about has to do with the German girl that came to Ecuador as part of the same student exchange. They told me she was a very white girl, perhaps even whiter than my own deathly pale skin, though I find that hard to believe. She tried to get a tan. The result was 2nd degree burns all over her body and a forced trip back to Germany to heal. So when I mention the heat and sun this charred land has, know that I speak the truth.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
The smallest bathroom in the WORLD.
Lately I've been jumping through a lot of hoops just to get my proper identification cards and open up an Ecuadorian checking account. Perhaps I'll detail the excruciating process in another post but for now let me just say that getting anything done in Ecuador that involves the government is a fool's task. Or maybe an unemployed person's task. They do not make it easy for you.
So, I was on one of my many journeys through various government buildings when I realized I needed to use a bathroom, badly. Readers beware: this is a story about a bathroom, there will be bathroom humor in it. The building I happened to be in was very large and must employ a couple thousand government workers. I figured that they would have at least one bathroom for the public. I was right but the bathroom I found can hardly be classified as such. I have never seen even a closet this small.
Inside I found a sink and toilet in bad condition. The sink juts out over the toilet and almost to the wall, I had to squeeze past it and could barely do so. The toilet is tiny. A fat man trying to use this bathroom would have to be pried out of it using the jaws of life. Standing up to use the toilet (and I wish that was all I needed to do) would have been impossible. There was so little room to move I had to unbuckle my pants with just one hand and use my new friend gravity to get them down. Then, in an Olympic feat of dexterity and skill swing myself around the sink and onto the toilet. This process was much harder to repeat in reverse. There was no soap to be found in that bathroom, only the household cleaner Ajax, so I used that instead. I find myself wondering what the architect was thinking when he drew the plan for that bathroom. Probably he realized too late the building did not have a public bathroom and took a small chunk out of some one's office to make one. No human being would do that on purpose, would they?
So, I was on one of my many journeys through various government buildings when I realized I needed to use a bathroom, badly. Readers beware: this is a story about a bathroom, there will be bathroom humor in it. The building I happened to be in was very large and must employ a couple thousand government workers. I figured that they would have at least one bathroom for the public. I was right but the bathroom I found can hardly be classified as such. I have never seen even a closet this small.
Inside I found a sink and toilet in bad condition. The sink juts out over the toilet and almost to the wall, I had to squeeze past it and could barely do so. The toilet is tiny. A fat man trying to use this bathroom would have to be pried out of it using the jaws of life. Standing up to use the toilet (and I wish that was all I needed to do) would have been impossible. There was so little room to move I had to unbuckle my pants with just one hand and use my new friend gravity to get them down. Then, in an Olympic feat of dexterity and skill swing myself around the sink and onto the toilet. This process was much harder to repeat in reverse. There was no soap to be found in that bathroom, only the household cleaner Ajax, so I used that instead. I find myself wondering what the architect was thinking when he drew the plan for that bathroom. Probably he realized too late the building did not have a public bathroom and took a small chunk out of some one's office to make one. No human being would do that on purpose, would they?
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Soccer in Ecuador
Last night I went to a soccer game. I figured it would be a good time and it's somewhat of a requirement for living in South America. I had been to soccer games in the United States as well as football, basketball, hockey and every other kind of sport so I figured this would be much of the same. Maybe the fans would be a little more rowdy?
I had no idea Ecuadorian soccer fans are raving, foaming-at-the-mouth insane and out of control. The stadium had a huge mesh covering over the entire field separating the stadium and the soccer field itself. As I learned later, this is a necessity. I doubt the opposing Brazilian team would dare enter the field without it. Police with automatic weapons and bullet-proof shields patrolled the grounds.
When the Brazilians entered the field, the fans went crazy. It was like a Two Minutes Hate. Complete with shouting obscenities and thrown beer bottles. Soon after, the President of Ecuador entered the field, which was quite a surprise. Apparently he is a fan of the team. People went nuts. Streamers were thrown through the mesh and onto the field. Fireworks and smoke bombs went flying into the mesh and into the stands. I couldn't tell if this was a show of support for the president or not. He quickly walked off the field followed by a hundred police and just as many reporters. This wild scene was repeated every time a goal was scored. Despite the collective will of the entire stadium, Ecuador lost. They took it pretty well though, everybody left singing fight songs and drinking beer.
I had no idea Ecuadorian soccer fans are raving, foaming-at-the-mouth insane and out of control. The stadium had a huge mesh covering over the entire field separating the stadium and the soccer field itself. As I learned later, this is a necessity. I doubt the opposing Brazilian team would dare enter the field without it. Police with automatic weapons and bullet-proof shields patrolled the grounds.
When the Brazilians entered the field, the fans went crazy. It was like a Two Minutes Hate. Complete with shouting obscenities and thrown beer bottles. Soon after, the President of Ecuador entered the field, which was quite a surprise. Apparently he is a fan of the team. People went nuts. Streamers were thrown through the mesh and onto the field. Fireworks and smoke bombs went flying into the mesh and into the stands. I couldn't tell if this was a show of support for the president or not. He quickly walked off the field followed by a hundred police and just as many reporters. This wild scene was repeated every time a goal was scored. Despite the collective will of the entire stadium, Ecuador lost. They took it pretty well though, everybody left singing fight songs and drinking beer.
Monday, April 9, 2007
Ecuador is hot.
Yes, it's true, I've arrived! The flight here took about 12 hours including all the delays. This city is much like Caracas in Venezuela, where I lived for 2 years as a missionary. The streets are a bit cleaner, but the buildings are crumbling, the sidewalks are crumbling, everything is in bad shape if you compare it to the United States. But I'm okay with that. The city is fun and crowded and as I'm typing this a group of loud protestors is marching by. All of their signs say something about Cono. I'm not sure what Cono is but it sure pissed these people off. Maybe the hot weather here just makes people angry. Heck, if Cono is another word for weather, I'd be protesting it too.
Seriously, it's freakin hot down here. I'm sweating so much, I'm afraid the torrents of liquid pouring off my body might short-circuit this computer. At least then they would have to get a new one, this one sucks.
Life here is definately a change of pace from Washington D.C. where I stayed a few days with my grandparents and my aunt Rosie. Rosie is handicapped and the sweetest person you will ever meet. Her mother (my grandmother) is an orchid freak. She even has her own greenhouse full of them. My grandfather is a good man, but tends to talk for an hour or so before he cares to listen to anything you have to say. I went on long walks with him and our conversations were basicaly his monologues. That week that I stayed in my grandfathers house was fun nonetheless.
Seriously, it's freakin hot down here. I'm sweating so much, I'm afraid the torrents of liquid pouring off my body might short-circuit this computer. At least then they would have to get a new one, this one sucks.
Life here is definately a change of pace from Washington D.C. where I stayed a few days with my grandparents and my aunt Rosie. Rosie is handicapped and the sweetest person you will ever meet. Her mother (my grandmother) is an orchid freak. She even has her own greenhouse full of them. My grandfather is a good man, but tends to talk for an hour or so before he cares to listen to anything you have to say. I went on long walks with him and our conversations were basicaly his monologues. That week that I stayed in my grandfathers house was fun nonetheless.
Saturday, April 7, 2007
Goodbyes Part II
Some might be interested in the pictures I took of my Bank friends and co-workers. I imagine those "some" all worked at the Bank with me. But for the rest of you who did not work with me, at least you get to see some cute girls. Or, if you are a girl, a cute guy. (me)
Club Trance was the place we partied at for Maria's 21st birthday. She's growing up so fast! *sniff* The club was supposed to have a model show, complete with catwalk and hot models. I was excited. But to my dismay the girls were modeling T-shits and all looked vaguely depressed.
I promised hot girls, did I not? Now if only I could edit Tim out of this picture...
We both look completely smashed, but only one of us is. Try and guess which one it is (hint: I don't drink 'cause I'm Mormon)
Two stunning Latina beauties. I have high hopes that Ecuador will be filled with them.
Anna in her natural environment. She can dance for hours fueled only by alcohol.
My friend Michelle is in the pic on the right. Thanks for keeping me sane at work :)
Club Trance was the place we partied at for Maria's 21st birthday. She's growing up so fast! *sniff* The club was supposed to have a model show, complete with catwalk and hot models. I was excited. But to my dismay the girls were modeling T-shits and all looked vaguely depressed.
I promised hot girls, did I not? Now if only I could edit Tim out of this picture...
We both look completely smashed, but only one of us is. Try and guess which one it is (hint: I don't drink 'cause I'm Mormon)
Two stunning Latina beauties. I have high hopes that Ecuador will be filled with them.
Anna in her natural environment. She can dance for hours fueled only by alcohol.
My friend Michelle is in the pic on the right. Thanks for keeping me sane at work :)
Goodbyes
Yes, I really am leaving the country. Many people were shocked to find this out, and I can't
blame them. It's been a year since I began planning this and being a natural procrastinator I tend to do things at my own pace (slow). But everything is coming together and tomorrow I leave for Ecuador.
My goodbye gathering at Tsukasa was a lot of fun, thanks to all for coming. I really am going to miss you guys.
blame them. It's been a year since I began planning this and being a natural procrastinator I tend to do things at my own pace (slow). But everything is coming together and tomorrow I leave for Ecuador.
My goodbye gathering at Tsukasa was a lot of fun, thanks to all for coming. I really am going to miss you guys.
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